for moms of teens

This is far from politically correct and very raw. Enjoy it with a drink and pass it along.



Hello,

my name is mom, I will be your tour guide through the teen years. Other names you will know me as are bitch, cunt, witch and of course there is mommy, always applied when you would like me to bend over and take it up the ass for you again! Along this journey you will learn that there is no fair involved. Fair is what you pay for a bus or taxi ride it does not apply to our relationship. I am not you friend or equal do not ever forget that. There may be times when I grant you permission into my adult world but make no mistake about it, as you guide and mother I am always in charge.

As your mother I do not have to appear reasonable, sane or even kind to you at any given moment. As a matter of fact If I ever start to seem kind, reasonable and sane for any more than say a day, be very, very suspicious. You as a teen are very good at being suspicious and dramatic. It is one of your best and most common qualities, so work hard and don't let the the other teens down by ever acting any different.

As your mother I also reserve the right to make what appear to be completely arbitrary and unjust decisions regarding you. As a teen I fully expect you to frequently claim that I don't care, that I am not fair (remember that is for the bus darling), that it is all my fault, heck I'm even anticipating some you don't love me or you hate me statements (if I hated you then you really wouldn't have lived this long). As your guide and mother and once having been a teen I know these are all bullshit so I promise to try really hard not to take them any more personally than when you leave your crap all over the house for everyone else to deal with.

As your mother it is my job to love you, to worry about you, to be in your buisness, to help you grow into a strong, independant, well rounded and functioning adult who has wise judgement and can make sound decisions. This is not an easy job and the pay does suck. I will complain often about it, as is my right. It is not my job to coddle you, let you wear blinders or pat you on the back and congradulate you for being a dumbass. You will frequently be told such thing as "tough people in hell want ice water now get over it". This is because I love you more than all the stars in the sky but you are being a dumbass.

Well to Hell or rather I mean Life have a nice tour!!!!!!!!